Tuesday, August 5, 2014

The Great Escape (Part Five of my Dazzling Career as a Cold Caller)

The cold-calling thing didn't suit me. Two months into the job and I'd acquired record breaking status. Two solid months of calls and I had not sold or secured one useful piece of information. It's safe to say that my 0% success rate indicated my overall aptitude for the job, but I was the only person it appeared to bother.
Such was my lack of motivation that I barely blinked when they showed me the brochure I could send out to a client.
I developed new and invigorating ways not to get through to the people I was calling.
Then one day during a particularly long stint of ridiculously pointless phone calls my mobile rang. This is highly unusual, I rarely use the device for anything besides time-keeping.
I answered the phone suspiciously...it was another job I'd applied for offering me the position.
I sat in shock. The end was finally here.
I was overwhelmed...
It took me sometime to gather all the various clothes I had strewn around my desk. It was about midday and as I looked around the office to proclaim violently that I was leaving I was faced with empty desks.
They couldn't even give me my victory march and to make matters worse it was another day before anyone noticed I had disappeared.


  1. Haha! I'm rather sorry that's all finished. Not the fact that you've escaped obviously...:-)


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